Where there is love

As you get older and move away from home, you come to expect that your birthday will most likely be a small affair. Of course your spouse or local friends will make sure you have a really special day regardless, but a birthday at 28 years old is just never the same as a birthday at 8 years old. There are exceptions to this, and I've come to realize that my birthday this year was probably one of the most unforgettable and special birthdays thus far.

My grandmother (Grandma O'Meara) passed away yesterday, and she died peacefully at home surrounded by her children while saying prayers. The past year or so had been really tough for her. She's been in and out of the hospital, experienced multiple complications with treatments and medicine, and had been overtaken by an exhaustion that kept her away from some of her favorite activities with her friends.

In the spring of this year, things started looking better and she decided that she wanted to go to Frankfort, Michigan in June and then spend a week at my Aunt's house in Maryland. My mom and her sisters have been going to Frankfort every year with my grandma for years, and it's a special place for them because they spent their childhood summers in that small town on Lake Michigan. My grandma's doctor gave her the go-ahead for the flight, although everyone knew it would be tough. She spent the week in Frankfort and, unfortunately, had to go to the hospital there.

She then flew to Maryland with my mom and spent the evening with me and Bogdan having dinner in celebration of my birthday. I was sad at how weak she looked, but despite it all (and my mom had tons of stories about the difficulties they had flying) she had a smile on her face. A contended look that I've come to know and expect from my grandma.

Grandma liked her seafood! :)

We ate at a crab and steak restaurant and my grandma was determined to have steamed crabs for her dinner. So she did. And my mom peeled and picked her crabs for her, and I pitched in too when I finished my entree, and we shared a birthday meal and what I now know was my last meal with my grandma.

My grandma was 87 years old when she passed yesterday and she lived a long and beautiful life. I cannot claim to know what impact she had on others' lives, but I don't doubt that she's touched and helped many people during her long life. I remember, as a child, being ecstatic about going to Grandma and Grandpa O'Meara's house and being able to play with my cousins (they had 14 grandchildren) in their huge front (and back) yard with an ancient oak tree towering over us and providing shade from the usually hot Louisiana sun. I remember when we found out she had breast cancer how scary it was watching her battle cancer, and how triumphant we all felt when she won. I remember her wearing a bright pink survivor's shirt at the Race for the Cure and feeling so proud for her and all of the other survivors at the race.

I remember after my grandpa died, I was only just starting college, wondering what it would be like to be at Grandma's house without him. And soon thereafter realized that my grandma was a separate person (as a child they were always "grandma and grandpa" to me) who was loving, kind, interesting and - as I mentioned before - always wore a smile.

My grandma got to see five of her grandchildren get married and got to love and play with two great-grandchildren.

I will miss her, and I'm sure my mom, dad, siblings and aunts and uncles and cousins will too. But I know she is resting peacefully now, she may even have caught up with her husband of 56 years and her son, and perhaps they are all together in the place where there is no more pain, no more tears, no more suffering. Where there is love.